Still hanging on..

Yesterday around 3:30ish I headed down to the Nursing Home to see my Papa. I got there the same time my parents and Hanna got there and we all went in and I was NOT ready.

I remember going on two years ago I would not go see my Oma, in fear of what it would be like. When I finally went to see her in her 'last days' she ended up dying that night. I like to think she was hanging on until she saw me! Sadly, she died three days before my birthday and the funeral ended up being right before my birthday, and then Thanksgiving being the next day.

I remember how sick she looked when she couldn't move in her bed and how she did NOT look like my Oma. When we went to the funeral, she looked beautiful! She looked JUST like my Oma. Hair done up, big gaudy gold jewelry and a flashy bright outfit! I know she was loving her style up in Heaven. I promise you, My Oma made big sunglasses IN!

Lots of times when a spouse dies, that person doesn't live too much longer [if they're a lot older.] My papa hung on for almost 2 more years, and he's still hanging on. He's 93 years old!

When I walked in yesterday, surprisingly, I didn't cry right away. He looks so helpless in there, and he's so skinny his ribs are poking out. It wasn't until my Mom told me to sing for him until I started crying. My Papa LOVES to hear me sing. But I just couldn't do it. Not without crying and my heart breaking MORE than it already was.

We stayed until about 11PM, and by that time they weren't sure he was going to make it through the night, but he did.. always throwing us for a loop, Papa! :)

The nurse made it clear last night that 'the end is near' but I am so thankful my Papa held on through my mom's birthday.. I can't imagine the saddness!

I love my Papa SO much, I remember everything about him when we were little, and I remember exactly how he looked last night. Not only do I remember every detail, I know my Papa.

My Papa has lived a long life! He has been through the great depression, he met my Oma when she was a coctail waitress, he loves Chicago, he was an iron worker, He helped build the Golden Gate bridge, he and Oma ALWAYS had Peach Nehi at their house, and last but not least-

He's leaving for Heaven soon, so I hope those Auburn fans are ready for a good talkin' to! ;)

I love you, Papa - ROOOOOOOLL TIDE ROLL!


Erica said...

praying for you & your family whit! let me know if you need anything. love you!

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